So much frustration (1/4/21)

I’m still typing up new entries on Weebly because it has taken me a while to figure out WordPress.
I got all the necessary things: domain name, hosting, WordPress, then couldn’t figure out how to do it. It was incredibly frustrating. I cried lots and lots of tears. I demanded a refund and they sent an email with instructions but I was so angry and frustrated I couldn’t deal with any of it for a good long while. I had to get over myself, and my anger, before I could launch into the incredibly frustrating process of following their instructions. More tears. More anger. Lots and lots and lots more frustration.
Weebly is very, very, very easy. It’s great that way. It’s not great because of how often I’m not able to get on to write a new post. The editor won’t open. Sometimes it’s days before it will work again. It’s been more than a week at times. That’s frustrating, too, which is why I decided I need to move to WordPress. Holy shit is WordPress — and the process of getting it all set up– hard as hell. I’m not sure it’s going to be worth the effort.
One thing, however, has been good in all this. I began the process of copy and pasting all the past blog posts here to WordPress. I haven’t read every post as I copy and paste, but I get bits and pieces. Like, I know now that mom started taking cranberry supplements last Christmas. That a year ago November she was still driving. That she was as confused last Christmas as she was this Christmas. I stopped the migration at the end of 2019 (for now; it’s late and time to sleep) and chuckled to myself. Little did we know what was coming in the new year. Oh boy.
So it’s been good to take down these notes and see where we are over the course of time. I’m going to not only continue but be more diligent about it.
So where are we now at the beginning of January 2021? Glad it’s no longer 2020, that’s for sure.
The other day I found something in the car that will display the time, date, and day of the week. No more asking me forty million times!!!! She still asks a billion times where we are going but at least I no longer have to tell her over and over again what day of the week it is while we’re in the car.
Mom started physical therapy last Friday (four days ago). We do exercises everyday, and she goes back again in three days. I’m doing them with her, and to be honest, it seems I could use them. My legs get tired doing all those lifts and kicks. She should get new “homework” on Thursday, but no matter what happens, these basic exercises we’ve been doing will become part of our daily routine for life.
I did some research into geriatric doctors and neurologists in the area and came up with nothing. I don’t think there is a single geriatric doctor in the area and the neurologists seem to focus on seizures and pediatrics. Well, at least none that take mom’s insurance. Maybe that’s the difference. In any case, I’m not sure what I can do about getting a second opinion. I did read, however, that sundowning can occur in people who don’t have dementia. I’m not sure that means it’s part of normal aging but it does at least mean she doesn’t necessarily have dementia because she sundowns. I read through some lists of symptoms compared to normal aging and she seems to have dementia symptoms. But I’m no doctor. How can I diagnose her?
I’m going to do a whole separate post on this once I get my thoughts together, but I’ve been doing a lot of thinking about the benefits of a diagnosis versus managing the symptoms best I can knowing vaguely what I’m up against. I’ve decided a diagnosis is important for obtaining services. So if nothing else, it seems important to get one for that reason alone. More on that another time.
Mom is her usual confused and forgetful self. Sometimes she’s very unconcerned and jokes about it. Other times she gets frustrated and wants to know why. I give her the, “The doctor said it was normal aging and there’s nothing you can do about it” line and change the subject. She hasn’t been diagnosed, and the doctor did say it was normal aging, so I’m not lying, am I?
One thing I’d like is more time to do research. I need to get my days better organized so that I get more done while she’s up and awake and needing entertaining; and when she’s napping or sleeping at night I can do research. I have books to read and videos to watch. There’s all kinds of stuff online, not to mention the Alzheimer’s Association pages. Even if mom doesn’t have dementia I’m certainly getting a good education in it, so it can’t be all bad, eh?
Okay, time for bed. I’ll try to write more tomorrow, as well as get more posts moved from Weebly to WordPress so I can start doing posts there on WordPress instead of here on Weebly in full knowledge that I’ll have to copy and paste it at a later date.

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